Episode 6 Working with the Energy in Your Business (and Yourself)

Episode Transcript

0:00 - 03:34 → Introduction to Living 2B Awesome

Erika: As health, wellness, and beauty experts, you know all about keeping a calm, peaceful space. But what about your business? Is that pretty calm? I'm Erika Dowell, business operations expert and your host of the Business Flow Formula podcast. Each episode, you'll get real-world advice and strategies from people who have been there and done that, and love to tell the tale, so you can clarify, streamline, and elevate your practice from the inside out.

Aimee: My business is called Living 2B Awesome. I basically use movement as a tool to help people be more awesome at life. Typically, working with women in transition. Whether that be motherhood, menopause, caring for your parents, career transitions, but using movement from that lens to help them really connect to themselves and put themselves in alignment. So, using nervous system regulation and calling myself a somatic strength coach. I am in love with kettlebells. I love kettlebells - using strength training to make you not just strong physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. I started Living 2B Awesome, actually, and my logo is a phoenix, and so a phoenix breaks down and comes back stronger, and that's what happened for me. I had been an entrepreneur for a long time. I did daycare for 10 years. I owned/co-owned a gym. I've done all the multilevel marketing, three different kinds of companies, like I've just always been wanting to be my own boss. But when Living 2B Awesome was born, it was kind of interesting on how it evolved because I already had a gym at that time, it was more of like a CrossFit gym, and that kind of fell apart.

At that time, I just was moving away from the fitness world and actually had a job as a customer service agent with WestJet, and I absolutely loved it, and it was really awesome. And people were like, well, what are you doing? And what's happening? And then COVID happened, and I lost that job, and I had already done this Instagram page called Living 2B Awesome. Someone said to me, You know what, Aimee? You are like a phoenix. You always come back stronger. So I just started to grow my business from there, and I've been just pivoting and pivoting, and I've been really good at pivoting and being able to match. And I just was able to realize that this is what I do really well.

I worked as a developmental service worker before I got pregnant, and then it wasn't working for me to be working shift work while my husband was working, and we were both single-parenting. So, then I created a business of my own home daycare so I could be with my kids and we could be, you know, making it work for us, and I’ve just been on this path of pivoting and being able to evolve with the outside world. So I was like, oh, that's interesting. That's what I'm really good at. And yes, I love strength and I love movement. Movement's been my therapy, my medicine. So now I just combine them both, and that's how I am here with Living 2B Awesome, and it's six years old now in October. 

03:34 - 06:15 → Experiences that have shaped Living 2B Awesome

Erika: That's amazing. So throughout all of that journey, obviously, you learned a lot of things through the processes. Whether that is co-owning a gym or being a customer service representative at WestJet, which talk about completely nearly opposite things. How did those things that you learned at, I guess your previous experiences, shape where you are now, and what did you take from them? Whether positives, like you absolutely wanna make sure that you do that with Living 2B Awesome or negatives, like absolutely not. 

Aimee: Things that I have taken is I love community, like I love community. That's a huge thing. So that's a huge part of my business is community and having a team and having people work with you. I have two amazing coaches that help me coach my classes when I am not able to. Learning to accept help and not doing the things that I don't like to do. Energy output to the things that just drain me, and so I can be better at what I am really good at and just giving people a space. It took me a while to get there. Like it took me a while to actually realize that that's what I got to do as an as a business owner. Not that, you know, had to do all these things. I get to just be that person that is really good at making someone feel safe in my space. And now I just know that I do everything to preserve that because that's why my business is successful, is because of the energy I bring to it, the energy leadership. So that's one of my really big core values is energy leadership, and how are you showing up with every piece that you do?

Can I come and own how I'm feeling, showing up to, you know, the backend stuff of business that you just don't really love to do? Can I just come in and know how long can I be in this energy to do this and set that up? Okay, when it's no longer feeling that I'm in alignment, it's getting harder. So I gotta shut it down and move forward. And maybe sometimes that's when I learn that's the part that someone else could do for you. And that took a long time as an entrepreneur, because I'm kind of a control freak. Like I want it to be done this way. I also found it really hard to kind of communicate that, so it took me a while to work through the ideas of communicating that because there's a lot of shame around the fact of some of the business things I didn't know. That's my own personal experience, but I feel like being able to be aware of where you are. You know, personally as well, as you show up in your business and being able to honour that and grow that as well. 

06:15 - 14:24  Finding Confidence & Mission Statements

Erika: And so when you talk about, you know, the areas of business that maybe you're not the most confident in, what things did you do or what habits do you have now to help you through those areas where maybe you're not as confident? Did you hire a coach? Did you hire someone in those areas, whatever they may be, to help you through that? Or how did you work through that confidence?

Aimee: Hiring a coach, a business coach. I would say it's just very new for me to be accepting, 'cause honestly, what I was doing is like, “oh, here's an app that's gonna make it easier.”

And then having to learn the app and getting frustrated on the app, and then the app's not helping. It's been a big trial and error, but I now have some people in my life that they help me with like QuickBooks, and I'm just like, okay, how can I simplify this? How can you make this a system? Just being like, no, you literally gotta tell me like down to this point, you can't assume that I know anything right now. I'm like, white knuckling this too. Another thing that was really helpful is the energy management behind it, because I already had a belief that I wasn't good at it. I already thought it was gonna be hard, and so many times I've been like “oh, that's actually not as hard as I thought it was gonna be”, that was just the noise I was hearing from other people talking and making my own story around it. Whereas I was like, I'm kind of old school, and I'd really love to write it down. I was like, well, what's wrong with writing that down and now once I gave that permission, I'm like, well, actually, I don't like writing it down. I can put it in this app now, but as soon as I was just like, you're doing a great job, Aimee. You're surviving. You're helping people. If you look at that core mission of your business, that has been really helpful for me. I work a lot with helping people with their mission statement, changing habits, and it's really funny that you can help people do that. And then all of a sudden you're like, wait, huh? I'm doing that in so many areas, but like, not here. 

I talk to people a lot about the brain's mission statement, which is: seek pleasure, avoid pain and do so with as little energy as possible. And so I come back to that. I'm like, oh, this is why this isn't sticking. Like, this feels like so much work, and this is painful. Like, I just don't even wanna show up to it. I kind of bounce things up against that, and I've used that mission statement. Having this podcast, I was like, you know, it really was beautiful. You gave me the questions, and I just see everything as growth. So it's just like, oh, I'm gonna polish up my mission statement. 

Erika: So it sounds like you revisit your mission statement from time to time and adjust it to fit where you are in your season of life. Then, is it fair to say that when I asked you to come on this podcast, you're like, Oh, let me go and revisit it. Is that what happened? 

Aimee: Hundred percent. And I am constantly because I have in the last little bit, like really changed and evolved and having a lot more trust in something that I've realized in the last little bit is like, my passion for my business is still here, but my passion to grow it and make it bigger and do more and be more and reach more, maybe still wanna reach more people has changed for me. And so being able to honour that I'm in a season of wanting to slow down, and what that means for me. Or I am accepting, and you know, you asking that question of what have you learned? I have really been programmed to constantly be wheels turning, like when I'm moving, when I'm doing an exercise that is, is for me, I'm like, oh, this is so great. I gotta write this down. This will be so good for so-and-so. I can write a program with this. Oh my gosh. Like, ooh, this could be good content. You know, maybe I should get my camera out and video it. And so that's where I come into that energy leadership of just calling out my own, like, ah, okay. And realizing that with me, giving myself permission to dial back.

I have four sessions. The odd time I will shift it. And that's mainly because I'm going on vacation. But like four in-person, energetic sessions, I know, is my max right now. I find it fascinating that I gave more of that energy in my past and how I did it, and how I didn't fall apart and when I was slowly, it showed up in certain ways. You know, lots of times I'm like, Why am I doing this? I just wanna go work for someone else. And then I'm like, wait, no, you don't because like right now, my husband has nine weeks vacation and I take them with him. I have a hybrid of my business where I created it to be more creative, and that's because I've dialed back and went, oh wait, like this can work but it took me a while to work on my energy management, to be in the energy of like, more is better, or like, I gotta be growing it. I gotta be doing this. So that was like, okay, energy leadership, you gotta accept some help, you're gonna dial back. That was my biggest resistance. That was my hard work. And the beginning was just to be okay with like, wait, I've set these boundaries and now I'm panicking, like I'm forgetting something. Like it's just sitting in like, okay, but I know I forgot something. Like I must have forgotten something. And so I would say that's been my biggest thing for me, it's just to that energy of how I'm showing up and honouring that and checking in on that and just, am I moving in the feeling that I hope to, right? Am I in alignment? 

My biggest core value is authenticity. And so just being able to bounce to that mission statement, like the brain's mission statement, is like, is this authentic to who I am, or is this me following into something that I think I should do? I've heard that, I've listened to someone else, and it's really working for them. I think it's great, I think it's an amazing skill that I have that I've grown to be like, oh, I'm gonna go on a podcast, I'm gonna talk about my business. Okay, this is an opportunity for me to grow, but I gotta bring myself into it. Not what does Erika wanna hear from me? What do the people that listen to Erika's podcast wanna hear from me? And so once I've done that, my marketing is just like, I'm just myself and like if someone asks me, I feel like I don't have a strategy other than be myself and line it up against that mission and be like, okay, is this going to be something that the people I want to reach wanna hear? Does this feel like I'm pushing it? Like, does it feel like me? If I'm spending more than 15 minutes on a post, like the content of it, I'm not great at editing and all the things, and that might take me longer. That's where I feel like I'm almost 50 years old. I'm like, okay, I didn't grow up doing this. So it's a learning curve, but I do enjoy it. So, I'm okay to spend the time on it, but if it's taking more than that, I just walk away and go, okay, save the draft. Come back. If it's not just feeling flowy and like a natural conversation that you would have with someone when they talk to you about what you offer. Then I really learned to walk away and give myself time and space, and I come back, and every single time it’s amazing to me that I found that so hard 15 minutes ago. 

14:24 - 21:03 Shifting Your Mindset and Energy

Erika: I really feel that some days, when I am creating content. When I first started my business and I was doing all the marketing myself, I was just like, Oh my God, this is so much time and energy. This isn't authentic to me. How can I do this differently? When it comes to, I guess, making the shift (quite literally) in your energy when it comes to managing your business and showing up for your clients or online and that kind of thing, how did you make the shift from like, here's what society, I guess if we can look at it that way, how does society want me to show up versus how do I want to show up and going the way that you want to show up and not worrying about what the rest of society says or suggests that you should do. When I say society, I mean like there's a lot of conversations online about how you should show up for your business or you need to post X many reels a week, or those kinds of things, and just kind of taking that and being like, none of that matters. I'm gonna do what feels good. How, why? When did you make that shift? Or maybe you still are in it? 

Aimee: I feel like I'm gonna constantly be in it 'cause it's my character and I'm honouring it. One of my things that I say in coaching as well, that I have kind of like thrown into one of my core values, is meet yourself in the middle of just being able to sit back and go, okay, here. It's kind of like a pros and cons, basically trial and error of like, I'm either, I used to be, I am no longer that person of speaking, but I'm either like all in and content every day and then I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't do content for like a month. So, being able to call out that pattern and notice that and having lots of crash times, lots of times where I was just following that pattern and then just being aware of it and being able to catch it now before it happened. And so that's basically how it happened.

I really believe that I was called, and my passion is this business. So all the clients that have come to me, they come in, I see their patterns so clearly, and then I give them this great advice, and then I was noting that was great advice, but because authenticity is my strongest, I gotta listen to that advice. I'm gonna like apply that. And so I'd say that's how it happened for me, was just again, knowing who I am, knowing my values, knowing how I wanna show up and using my coaching business and how I am showing up, and them being able to go, okay, shoot. There's the little snag, there's the snag that if I don't move, will take the things to unravel, right? It just slowly unravels. Like, if you think of like in a sweater, right? It would just be like, Ooh, if I don't kind of notice that and sit with that. And it's funny because I did accept help, and it was great, but also like when you accept help, question their help and question if it works for you. I don't mean to question it as I hear what you're saying, but I'm not sure if it's completely what works for me, but I could take pieces of that. I like pieces of that, and that's where we will meet in the middle, comes like, oh, okay, well I am gonna take that and maybe I'll give it a try, but ooh, I actually still have to make sure that I'm connected to my core values and my mission. And then where do I make my own little plan here?

Like, well, this is how it works for me because this one feels good. And there's times where you have to call your own stuff out and go, does this really feel good? Or are you just feeling confident? And that is just doing the work. And that's really built my confidence because I mean, you know, today I'm like, Hey, I've been an entrepreneur forever, but I would say two years ago, I was like, well, I did daycare. I mean, while I did daycare, I had like, I had five kids under two plus my own. So like seven kids under three, we'll say. And I had to deal with their parents, different personalities, fed them, you know, managed all those things and had an income that made us be able to still have a family. And that is pretty incredible. 

Right. And being able to be, well, I had a business, but like a partnership failed, and in that one, that one really did crush me, and I would say even, maybe took even further step backwards because the saying was it's just business. So I was like, well, business sucks. I don't like business. This feels gross. This feels disgusting. Uh, ew. I don't want to do this. And so having to work through my own new definition of business and doing the work and getting to evolve. That's what I love about being an entrepreneur is because I can stay in my authenticity, and I can pivot, and you're not going through systems. Hearing people that are like, well, I'm gonna have to go through these, this, this, this, and this, if I wanna make this change. I'm like, well, I just go through that, that, that through me and decide if that's a change, then the changes happen. And we get to grow. And it gets to be like, to me, my business is just like a nervous system. Like it has a pulse and I’m just gonna let that pulse, you know, sometimes it's up here and it's gonna titrate, here's this regulation line, and sometimes I'm up here, but I know that that means that I'm gonna have this rest. But maybe at little peaks, most of the time I'm just kind of going up and down, up and down, and I can do that all day long. Like that happens during the day, but then also at weeks at a time. There's certain times, especially when you're in the fitness world, like September is like, okay, let's get them all in. I do know that I have the system in place to know, okay, but if that's gonna happen, and just learning from your mistakes and welcoming. 

I'm now at this point where I kind of like a little giggle when I've messed up or I've found myself back close, because now I'm pretty clear when I'm getting close to that edge, I don't wait for the fall. And notice that when that happens, there's actually like this cool thing on the other side that there's gonna be an opportunity for this system to clean up. There's something you've been missing, and you're like, okay. And so then that allows for true growth. And one of the coolest things for me is I work less, but make more.

21:03 - 24:26 → Shifts in Business

Erika: When it comes to making that shift, because I know when we spoke offline, you said that you were working like four hours a day right now, and you're making more. Is that because you're just simply charging more, or is that because you have just found ways to simplify your business so that you're not spending all this money and energy and time pouring into your business and then burning yourself out? 

Aimee: Exactly. It was both. You know what? I think that I started to like take away those things 'cause they were costing too much and 'cause it wasn't making sense. Right. You're like, okay, I'm going at a panic. I had that idea that I knew that I wanted to streamline this and make it more simple. So then I'd be like, okay, yeah, I'll use that. In the meanwhile, I'm like, oh my gosh, there's like these apps are all like, yeah, they're great, but they're adding up.

Took those all away. Sat with it. Before, I couldn't raise my rates. It just wasn't sitting with me. I couldn't do it. Like, it just was, I didn't have the confidence, I didn't have the energy, I didn't have the realization of what my worth was because I wasn't giving myself worth. Like I was just juggling and trying to put out all these fires, if you will, but not really. Just temporary fixes. I feel like I call them phoenix moments. Everything fell on me, crashed again, right. Here we are. Aimee is back-pivoting. 

So I had a studio. It made sense when I started, but then, you know, just as business does, I had to close it again because I realized this overhead is just not making sense, and I'm doing this because it's for everyone else and not for me. I was trying to make this sense, and I'm overdelivering and underappreciating, but I couldn't see how I could move from that. So it was about taking that all away, dialling back, coming to me, getting more clear on my vision, my mission, my core values. And then I saw my worth, and then I was like, no, here's what I get. This is what you get from me. I am so different than coming into a class. I am gonna give you this, this, and this. And so here is my rate, and I can, and I'm with you inside, outside your session. And now I have that capacity. And I love, I love just because I've come to this hybrid model, like seeing people. Then, because I go on vacation, I'm like, okay, I'm gone for two weeks. Here you go. Here's your workouts, but we're in an app, and I get to be like, I like my husband's like, whatcha smiling at? I'm like, oh my gosh, just one of my clients just had a realization, and I'm on vacation, I'm not working, but I am. I literally love getting the messages.  I'm excited to check them because I took care of me first. I made sure I'm in my energetic alignment, making sure that I am sitting with those core values, knowing what I am.

And so, I charge more, but I deliver more. And it just feels really in alignment. And then there was just more, there was just more, I could see more spaces of where, like, this doesn't make sense, so let's clean it up. Like, why didn't I see that these two could go together and that this would look like this? So it's a combo. It's a combo of like taking away the things and then actually getting the support that I need that was in alignment. Not like a band-aid. 

24:26 – 30:30 → Finding Simplicity 

Erika: Something that I've been thinking about in the last few weeks is just simplifying life a little bit more, and I go through this season professionally and personally, but it's really where I look at my work life. I'm like, wow, this is, I've overcomplicated it. Something has happened, and I overcomplicated something. How do I simplify this? Or in my personal life, it's very easy to overcomplicate it. We move around a lot due to my spouse's job, and naturally, everything just gets way too complicated over a short period of time, and then we start unravelling it and making it more simple.

But I still have to sit here even though we're a year out of a move, and I'm like, okay, life is starting to feel complicated again. Why is it complicated? What have we overcomplicated? Are we too busy socially? Are we too busy around the house? Are we too busy with X, Y, Z? And it's always the too busy, and I think hearing what you're saying is you took the busy and you just made it easy, which is a very simplified way of like, oh yeah, you just took busy and you made it easy. Was there a lightning moment, or I guess a phoenix moment, where it was, I'm just gonna take this and I'm gonna try this method and see if it works, and it did. Or was it just reiterate, reiterate until you're where you are. 

Aimee: There's a bunch of 'em. Actually, an interesting one is that my kids left my home like empty nesters, and I, that was a pretty crushing moment for me, which literally took me outta left field. I'm proud, like I raised those kids. I've raised them to fly. I'm like, yes, let's go. And there was just a piece of me that fell apart that didn't have capacity anymore to be in the energy. So they left like eight months apart, and that was November. And then I closed my studio in March of that year. So I would say it was definitely like my heart was just a little bit broken, and I just didn't have - my nervous system just crashed, and that's where really I've pivoted.

I've been doing this kind of work forever, but wasn't able to put it into words either. Like, I also couldn't tell you what I did. I wasn't clear, like I didn't have that clarity in my business. I was like, well, I'm like a life coach that uses movement, people come to me, but I don't have before-and-after pictures. I knew it, but I had no voice in it. That I would say has just really evolved over time, and it wasn't overnight; it's constant. And I still look at it like, oh, are we doing this again, Aimee? This time in life, I'm so grateful that that voice has quieted. I did that voice for 25 years. Like the fact that I think it's just gonna go away, right? Because I've been doing business since that time, and just now being like, yeah, we are just evolving. We're getting more clarity. We're actually getting to the real you, Aimee. 

Which is also so interesting that I find, I believe in true synchronicities, timing is everything, the way it's meant to evolve. Knowing about the brain, there's this reticular activating system, right? That's in our brain; that's just filtering out the stories that you believe are true. So like we're getting a million things put in us all the time, but you're only, your brain is going to work for you to prove you right.

So, if you have stories of scarcity, of this being hard, of like I have to work hard to be valued, that means I'm great. If I'm doing hard things like that, I am killing life. I was looking for all the hard things to show that I was doing it right, and now, with doing the work and changing the stories and the beliefs that I have, I now see the world differently.

Like, I just see that as an opportunity. I still see, oh, there's a challenge. And then I also see that sometimes I can't cope with that challenge, and just being able to go, okay, what story is holding us back here? What do we need to go to? And to me, coming to my core values and coming to that mission of like, okay, are we moving in with intention? Are we doing small things to get the big results, or are we looking for a big result here and only gonna get a small one? What's the feeling behind this? is basically what I have come to that has been, and then, like you said, in all areas of my life. That's part of my value, too. Yeah, we're using movement, but we're teaching you that exercise is stress. How are you showing up to stress, a conversation, your business, traffic, hormones, health, all of 'em? It's like, how are you showing up to that? So to me, in my business, I get the opportunity to see lots of different nervous systems come through, and I take it. I've been given a gift to be able to see that and know what the right thing is to say.

I feel like because I do that and have authenticity that comes back to me, and I learn from them. I'm like, oh, okay. I can see a piece of me in this. What can I take from this? And so after every session, I make sure there's 15 minutes just to let their energy go and then come into my own. I see the world differently after every client I see, after every challenge I have. So there's a piece of me that gets slightly excited about difficulty 'cause that is something that I always had and I get to keep it, but I change it in just the lens of it and the energy behind it. That's where I come with that energy leadership.

30:20 - 34:58 → When is Enough, Enough?

Erika: I mean, we've talked a lot today about the energy that we bring into our business, making sure we're not overgiving our energy and those kinds of things. And we also briefly spoke on how you're working less, making more, and a conversation that I have because I'm really heavy in the finance side of businesses is: what is enough? Like, when is enough enough? How much money, how much time, how much employee? How much employees? How many employees? I do numbers, not words. How did you know or how do you know when enough is enough? 

Aimee: That is such an interesting slippery slope for myself because I, again, because of this authenticity. I think I had, and we're all gonna be unique and we're all gonna be different, but what really is of value to me and what I see as abundance is time, is freedom, is space, is vacations. Like for me, that's how I know enough is enough, like that I can still pay all my bills, not be in debt, have my home, do all those things. But the thing is, is that over COVID, we converted a van into a camper, and that was like our little getaway, which was so great, as our kids left, and you know, reconnecting with my husband again because we've been co-parenting and just getting to learn to know each other. In the van, we have one spoon, one fork, one knife, and one cup. That was, and if you ask about pivotal moments, that made me realize that I've been looking at this all wrong. I crave that. That feels so in alignment. And I have, I've hired the coaches, and I've had moments where I'm like, you know, these big launches and these courses, they were really great, and I'm excited to be able to do them again. And I see them coming into my future very soon, now that I'm getting clearer, and I can do it from the energy that wasn't all of the rules and the shoulds and the things that I should do. And I just realized that how do I know enough is enough, is whenever I wasn't happy there. I was like, you know, that's where I was putting Band-Aids on. And that's where I was doing this, but that's me. Other people like to thrive on different things. I think a lot of people couldn't live in a van. I literally dreamed to be online in my future and be able to just go in my van or a tiny home like I crave smaller. That's what I want. So it's whatever your vision is. But my vision knew that it was enough, now that I'm clear on what actually brings me, grounds me, makes me feel good, is like being in nature, having more property, less home. Like, even in my business, really, like, here's the things that I do less. I think that's where sometimes, like right now, it's so simple.

I'm like, am I missing something? Like, you know, because like they're like, oh, I gotta do my, and I'm like, well, I just did that. That was like, okay, that's what I craved. But I was resisting it. Like, it's like, oh, you're here and you're doing it, and you're like, it's like when I did daycare, I absolutely loved it. I can't imagine that I did it 'cause I was a different, you know, right now it seems crazy, but I literally once it wasn't good, like once I didn't wanna be that crotchety old lady that like was grumpy doing daycare. And soon as I started to notice that I was not in that energy, I just pivoted. And then I worked as an educational assistant, and when I didn't wanna be one of those people that like, ugh, these kids, I hate it. I'm going to work. I pivoted, I worked in group homes. Same thing like this, there was a negative kind of energy. Ugh, I just can't do that. Like, even when I left my business, like I didn't want to. I'd never looked at it from this lens until now, but like leaving that partnership crushed me. It was another phoenix moment. It took me like four years, maybe even five, to heal from that. I'm just so proud now because I look at myself and go, hell girl, you are doing it right. Whereas before I was like, Oh my God, I can't stick with anything.

I just move on. I just move on. I just move on. And so now I'm like, wait, this is what everyone needs to know. You can pivot, you can change, you can grow. And the wisdom I have. Constantly pivoting is come to you, come back to you. You have wisdom. Your body has wisdom, your experiences have wisdom. We aren't trained to let that be our leadership.

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